A Me-Me-Memory....

For those of you that DON'T watch television news 24/7.....

It's kind of like watching the entertainment during the wee hours of the Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy Telethon. It's slim pickin' at 0300, my friends.

MSNBC re-runs their centerpiece evening programs ad infinitum; FOX runs pretty much the same thing...all O'Reilly, ALLATIME!

Other channels run the dreaded infomercial, which makes me wonder what advertising genius chooses the fictional panels for the Magic Bullet: the old lady with the cat's eye glasses, chain-smoking the cigarettes is particularly jarring, if they are aiming at realism.

And can Ron Popeil be any more excited about the newest RONCO product? They guy is going to need medicating, if he's not careful.

I once did a pilot for an 'infomercial' type thing. It was written and produced by a guy named Chris Bearde, who produced Laugh-In and The Gong Show and such...he's a very funny guy. We met when he used a part of something I put together and produced for a theatre out in California; he came, he saw, he liked, he borrowed. And he put me into this little variety program. I think I have a tape of it somewhere.

I'm recalling my terribly manic version of "there's no business like show business", while whipping the company into shape. It's a bit hazy, though. I could be wrong.

It did give me an opportunity to meet Cheryl Ladd (who is stunning in real life) and her husband (who's kind of a doofus, but a good-natured one). I also got a chance to shake hands with the great Jonathan Winters, and I should have had him sign something, but I was being all stoically professional.

But this pilot was something he was doing for one of the shopping networks, on spec. The premise was unique at the time.....it was a soap opera kind of thing, with characters and plots and such, but everything on the set was for sale. And every so often, one of the characters would describe an item, show it off, and such; all in character, and all integrated into the storyline, such as it was.

I played the villain. It was a great time. There was some interest in it, but I think they passed on it. In either case, they would have re-cast.

Wish I had a copy of it. Chris Bearde is a nice man, but forgetful. He's married to a psychic, though...so, every so often, I send off a vibe. Maybe he'll get the message.

The vibe usually includes my address, just in case.

Next time, on AN UNFINISHED CONVERSATION:

I'll talk about how much more fun it is to play a villain than it is a hero.
Be warned: scenery will be chewed.